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  #1  
Old January 13th, 2012
1madmommy 1madmommy is offline
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Default Do I leave it alone or retract it?

I have a big problem now. And I'm really sorry in advance for the long backstory.

My son, who has a very loose circumcision, was referred to a pediatric urologist for meatal stenosis and urination problems. She said he also had penile adhesions, and prescribed steroid cream for them. We were using the cream when I noticed these "adhesions" just looked like normal smegma in an intact penis. Also, the "adhesions" were far below the circumcision scar and the area the OB had removed the foreskin from the glans. In other words, this skin was still attached normally. So we stopped using the cream.
At our last appointment, she went over results of an ultrasound and wanted to see his penis. She said he still had adhesions and she should break them now or he'd need surgery later. I explained that he had a loose circumcision and the skin there was still attached and had never even been separated from his penis; it was still acting like an intact penis. She looked at me like I was crazy and insisted if she didn't do it he would need surgery. (Because, obviously, despite seeing my son's penis several times a day, every day for months, I had no idea what it was supposed to look like or how his circumcision was done.) I said to her, "Fine, you can try to gently separate it, but if my son even shows signs that he is uncomfortable, you must stop." She said okay, and gently touched his penis. He began to whine a bit so she stopped. Then she touched it and gently stretched the skin again. He started to whine again, but instead of stopping this time, she jerked the skin all the way down his shaft very quickly, separating it. My son let out a scream, I yelled, "Oh my God", and my son's father jerked. My mother was also in the room and said, "What happened?" The doctor kept messing with his penis so I told her to stop. She handed me gauze and told me to clean "that white stuff" and that I now have to retract it and clean under it every time. I told her I would do it when we got home, when he was taking a bath.

I've been checking his skin every couple of hours and it is red and swollen now, almost to the point of bleeding. It definitely was still attached and now there seems to be bits of skin torn on the inside, where it was attached. He keeps crying whenever he urinates (even in his sleep), and is having difficulty nursing because he won't lay on his side.

I only know how to care for intact penises (one reason why I didn't want him circ'ed in the first place), so I don't know whether to follow her advice and keep retracting it, or leave it alone. Any advice?

Also, my partner and I are pretty pissed at her for not following my directions. He wanted to punch her in the face, as did I, after she retracted his remaining foreskin.
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  #2  
Old January 13th, 2012
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peterpink peterpink is offline
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Default Re: Do I leave it alone or retract it?

Meatal stenosis is the most common early complication of circumcision.

Your OB is an ignorant fool. The average age of complete foreskin separation is 10.4 years. By tearing the membranes between between the foreskin and the glans she has opened up the tissue for infection and induced adhesions as the tissues try to repair. In my country she could be charged with malpractice. In the USA where doctors have a psychosexual need to see the exposed glans, which they consider is normal at birth, your OB is carrying out what is culturally normal treatment. You could try legal action or at least threaten her with it. Unfortunately the original circumcision will have caused the greater sexual disfunction through sensory loss.

You have failed on two counts to protect your child. How will you explain to him that you have allowed this to happen?
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  #3  
Old January 13th, 2012
1madmommy 1madmommy is offline
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Default Re: Do I leave it alone or retract it?

Quote:
Originally Posted by peterpink View Post
Meatal stenosis is the most common early complication of circumcision.

Your OB is an ignorant fool. The average age of complete foreskin separation is 10.4 years. By tearing the membranes between between the foreskin and the glans she has opened up the tissue for infection and induced adhesions as the tissues try to repair. In my country she could be charged with malpractice. In the USA where doctors have a psychosexual need to see the exposed glans, which they consider is normal at birth, your OB is carrying out what is culturally normal treatment. You could try legal action or at least threaten her with it. Unfortunately the original circumcision will have caused the greater sexual disfunction through sensory loss.

You have failed on two counts to protect your child. How will you explain to him that you have allowed this to happen?
Actually, the OB did his circumcision as a newborn and we will most likely be seeking litigation for that, but this is a pediatric urologist (from a very good children's hospital, no less) who retracted him. I had given her specific directions (if he shows signs he is uncomfortable, stop) and she agreed to them, but then did the opposite. Believe me I am extremely upset over this and we are now going to tell all his doctors that no one touches his penis but us, and when he is older, he can do it himself if they need to check it that badly.

But I would like to know what I should do about the problem she has caused now? Should we retract it? Or try and let it heal itself?
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  #4  
Old January 13th, 2012
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Tally Tally is offline
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Default Re: Do I leave it alone or retract it?

Leave it alone. It sounds like your original assessment was correct, he was developing normally with the damaged part of the foreskin attached as it should be. There is disagreement among intactivists about retracting cut foreskins. Marilyn Mylos says leave it alone. I agree in this case. Let the boy heal.
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  #5  
Old January 13th, 2012
Science Monk Science Monk is offline
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Default Re: Do I leave it alone or retract it?

The first order of business, right now, is to make sure that the red, raw surfaces on the glans and inner foreskin remnant of your son's penis do not stick together. If they do, they may grow together to form hideous post-surgical adhesions and skin bridges as shown in the online galleries of botched circumcisions on the circumstitions.com website:

http://www.circumstitions.com/Botched1.html

Thus, it would seem essential to keep the foreskin retracted to the extent needed to allow these raw surfaces heal separately. Follow any protocol that you have been given for keeping the area clean. I have read of parents being told to keep the fresh, raw surfaces of their young son's newly circumcised penis smeared with Vaseline or other ointment. This would function to keep the raw surfaces from sticking and growing together.

Once forcibly retracted, you cannot initially care for a child's penis using the instructions for intact penis care without serious risk of formation of post-surgical adhesions and skin bridges. After healing of the surfaces of the glans and inner foreskin remnant has occurred, the foreskin can naturally be drawn forward over the penis for the best outcome over you son's lifetime.

One proviso: I am not a licensed health care professional in any state, country, or municipality, and nor do I pretend to be. Thus, the advice given in this post is not to be construed as medical advice. I'm just a humble scientist who has studied intactivist issues for over a decade.

I'm sorry to hear you are having to go through this. Your story made me shutter. Good Luck from here on.

David
World As Monkey Island
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  #6  
Old January 13th, 2012
admin admin is offline
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Default Re: Do I leave it alone or retract it?

The forcible retraction was criminal asault. Any "procedure" she thought needed done could have waited for your fully informed consent with the option of getting a second opinion.
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  #7  
Old January 13th, 2012
asdfjklmeh1 asdfjklmeh1 is offline
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Default Re: Do I leave it alone or retract it?

I cannot believe that a urologist could EVER be so ignorant.

That being said, I think the least painful thing you can do for your son is to leave it alone. If you don't, it may cause him pain every single time you retract his foreskin remnant, as you will be ripping open a fresh wound.

The best thing I think you can do at the moment is let things heal up, and let the chips fall as they may. Again, I am not a trained, competent pediatric uroligist, but my gut instinct says "don't reopen a wound on a regular basis."

Your case against doctors abusing the genitals of your son keeps growing and growing. I can't imagine the stress and frustration dealing with such vermin of people who supposedly swear to "first do no harm" then literally rip your son's penis apart.

I read your story and I want to scream at the top of my lungs at the idiot who caused your son so much pain.

Keep a brave face, and let things heal up.

I am so sorry.
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Last edited by asdfjklmeh1; January 13th, 2012 at 16:51.
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  #8  
Old January 13th, 2012
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JimOZ6 JimOZ6 is offline
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Default Re: Do I leave it alone or retract it?

1madmom, you have, I trust, terminated your relationship with this particular urologist? To continue would implicate you as an active participant with an unskilled physician; and future responsibilty would fall upon you since you are aware of this now. You can find better.

Nothing to add to what others have said. But litigation is in order. Else this idiot will continue to commit her malpractise.


J

Last edited by JimOZ6; January 13th, 2012 at 12:45. Reason: spelling
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  #9  
Old January 13th, 2012
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z726 z726 is offline
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Default Re: Do I leave it alone or retract it?

Quote:
Originally Posted by 1madmommy View Post
Actually, the OB did his circumcision as a newborn and we will most likely be seeking litigation for that, but this is a pediatric urologist (from a very good children's hospital, no less) who retracted him. I had given her specific directions (if he shows signs he is uncomfortable, stop) and she agreed to them, but then did the opposite. Believe me I am extremely upset over this and we are now going to tell all his doctors that no one touches his penis but us, and when he is older, he can do it himself if they need to check it that badly.

But I would like to know what I should do about the problem she has caused now? Should we retract it? Or try and let it heal itself?
Find another doctor if you can. It sounds like that one was only used to dealing with circumcised penises, plus she didn't seem to care that she was causing the child pain unnecessarily. Try contacting someone at NOCIRC - they may be able to refer you to a pediatrician in your area more familiar with the intact penis.

I'm no doctor, but common sense would be to let the kid's injury heal for now. I'm guessing some of the pain he experiences may be caused by friction from diapers, so you might want to be careful not to put them on too tightly. Plus if any of his glans is exposed, that's probably the part that would hurt most for him.
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  #10  
Old January 13th, 2012
asdfjklmeh1 asdfjklmeh1 is offline
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Default Re: Do I leave it alone or retract it?

Here is a list of foreskin-friendly doctors compiled by the Whole Network:

http://www.thewholenetwork.org/intac...y-doctors.html

I hope you can find another doctor who can help your son!
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Last edited by asdfjklmeh1; January 13th, 2012 at 15:42.
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